Believe it or not I'm a financial analyst for an industry leading company and I'm a mental math dummy.
I didn't learn math until I was in my 20's. I avoided it for my entire childhood. Then I discovered I loved finance and economics so when I finally started taking my education seriously, I hunkered down ground my way through basic algebra through differential calculus. I got B's and even tutored other kids for the math department.
Nevertheless, I still can't do mental math, especially in front of people. I either freeze or I just always screw it up. My biggest fear is in meetings, I just keep my mouth shut. I have to wait until I get back to my desk to do simple calculations in Excel to decide if a proposal is even worth analyzing further. It really sucks. I'm basically squeaking by.
Now I want to go to business school and the GMAT is by arch enemy. It's a timed test that does not allow the use of a calculator. Pressure + No calculator = I'm screwed.
It regularly brings me to tears because I have tried everything. Like I said, I took four or five math classes in a row as a undergrad. I earned a BS in Finance,I have read books, used mental math software. No matter what I do, it never sticks. I know one day I'm going to exposed in front of everyone for the dumb ass that I really am and my career will be over.
I just want to be smart and capable of doing arithmetic in my head quickly. I feel so bad and so inadequate. It's making me miserable
feeling like such a dummy every day. I need help. I just don't know what kind of help. At this point I'm open to anything -- drugs, therapy, etc. I just don't want this dark cloud hanging over my head for the rest of my life!
MMD
Location: Southeastern U.S. Posts: 322 Joined: 2008-11-10
Hi MMD and welcome! I'm just going to throw this out to you. I don't think this is for everyone, but may be worth looking into. I have two friends with children diagnosed with dyscalculia. Both entered their children into programs that help dyslexics. They both claim that it made amazing differences in how their children learn.
Basically, as I understand it, they break you down to the lowest level of learning and teach you again using different methods. For example, a number line learning consists of literally getting down on your hands and knees and crawling up and down an huge number line on the ground. You learn math in a much more "visual" way or in ways that use your other senses.
I heard of a young man in one of these courses who had an extremely high IQ. He was maxing out his grades in all subjects as a senior in high school, except for math. He thought he knew everything and didn't believe in the program. His parents made him attend a demonstration. Supposedly he was amazed that what they did made a difference for him.
I only bring these programs up because I have heard it from the people it directly helped. I do know that there are some who believe that the brain can be "retrained". Some of this depends on what type of learning difficulty you have. You obviously have terrific coping skills, so this might be something that can benefit you.
If you'd like a specific name of a program, please PM me. This is not an advertisement. We have not decided to place our daughter in the program at this time.
Good luck and welcome!
Parent of math impaired 14 year old daughter.
"...they think a lot of my issues are caused by math anxiety (but my anxiety would be caused by dyscalulia, now wouldn't it?)" - AnimalHugger
Location: Texas USA Posts: 6102 Joined: 2008-05-25
4/8/09
Dear MentalMathDummy,
Welcome!
Hey, I must be getting smarter by reading this forum. Look what I've found for you! I'll post the link, and then put some of the fun parts in red. You'd need to get diagnosed with Mathematics Disorder 315.1 on Axis I. This is in the DSM IV. I know of an Educational Psychologist in DFW area of TX who is good. I'm sure there are others, but I just don't know who they are yet. Send me a PM if you want the phone number of mine. You could get up to double time to take your GMAT if you have a Mathematics Disorder! - jus'
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Edited by justfoundout on April 12 2009 04:45 PM
Wow justfoundout, this is fantastic! I can maybe knock out two birds with one stone. 1.) Finally find out if I'm truly dyscalculic and 2.) possibly be accommodated for the GMAT.
Thanks and I will PM you momentarily.
Monkeyfeathersmom, thank very much. Retraining is also something I have always thought about. I just have never had the time to start from scratch. If I could find some kind of retaining that would fit my life, I would be all for it. I will be in touch with you also.
MMD
I just joined the forum, along with my tweenage daughter. I 'discovered' I had dyscalculia only when looking for ways to help her with her mental math issues.
Living with it for so long (30some years, now), I developed such a severe case of math phobia. I would feel anxious in situations where math was involved, this would lead to a mental math breakdown, which in turn would make me less able to function with mental math, which would propagate the fear, which would lead to a mental math breakdown...etc, etc.
From what I am reading, you've at least been able to avoid this math phobia enough to work with numbers every day, so that's encouraging!
Is the root of your problem what you'd written:
"I know one day I'm going to exposed in front of everyone for the dumb ass that I really am and my career will be over."
?
Because that would stop me cold!
I realize my internal dialogue surrounding my dyscalculia causes more stress (if not more) than the actual disability. I don't know if you have kids or not? but, what has been helpful for me is actually helping my daughter develop positive self talk. I guess it would be considered a form of cognitive behavioral therapy.
Sometimes that means we take a statement like what you wrote (and believe me, my daughter and I totally have felt that!) and finish it out to it's worst conclusion.
Your'e in a meeting. You've been promoted to a position of manager/leader so you're running it. It's established you are well liked and respected because that's what's gotten you into your job. There haven't been issues with your math ability up till now, when you can calculate in the comfort of your own office. You come to a quick problem that needs to be solved. What now?
1) ask a coworker what the answer is. Put someone else on the spot to take pressure off yourself. Just ask for the answer as the leader of the meeting, not as a favor because you can't do it.
or
2) announce that you can't concentrate and would someone else give you the answer. Blame it on lack of coffee or something?
or
3) describe your situation with numbers to your team. They already know you can do math reasonably well. Do they think it's quirky and interesting? Do they step up to the plate and help out in meetings when needed? Hopefully. Do they laugh at you and call you a dumb ass? Probably not...not with you as their boss.
I don't know if that helped, but that kind of roleplaying helps both my daughter and I out. That and the realization that if we want people to be OK with our dyscalculia, first WE need to be OK with it. I knew this guy who ran companies when they got into distress. He was great at his job, but completely ADD. Probably that's what made him so good. He could look at a spreadsheet and work things out in his mind, and work for 22 hours straight, but he could not pay attention to what people said to him. AT all. He got around this by barking out to people, "Give me the info, but talk to me like I'm a fifth grader. Keep it simple!" lol. He found his solution, he was confident with his abilities and knew even with his shortcomings he was still a capable guy.
Incidentally, my sister is dyscalculic but loves physics/calculus, and is now a math teacher in high school. Her experience, while terrifying at first, has been a great one. She explains her issues with numbers at the beginning of the school year. She's found this puts people at ease, because most people understand struggling with something. When she has her dyscalculic moments at the blackboard, she realized that the students were quicker to help out, making them not only pay more attention but also think harder about the lessons. It's turned out great.
This is long (sorry!) but I hope it's helped a little?!
Location: Texas USA Posts: 6102 Joined: 2008-05-25
4/12/09
Dear Mom2Teeco,
I'd just finished writing something similar about asking a co-worker to do the math during a meeting. I posted it on another Thread. Then, after writing that, I came over onto this Thread and started 'catching up' on what's been written. When I read your above posting, I had to look at the date on it to be sure that I'd never seen it before,... and I hadn't! I was afraid for a moment that I'd read your a few days ago, and that it had stuck somewhere in my subconscious, and that I'd practically 'copied' it when I'd written my post on the other Thread. This doesn't prove that we're both right, of course, but it was really nice to see that we agree! - jus'
Edited by justfoundout on April 12 2009 04:56 PM
Location: Texas USA Posts: 6102 Joined: 2008-05-25
4/19/09
Hi maison09,
I see that this is your first post here on the forum. If you'd like, you can post yourself a whole new Thread and tell us more about yourself, or even what you think of us! Welcome, whether you do this or not. - jus'
Location: whats it matter? i wanna be elsewhere. Posts: 240 Joined: 2009-03-30
hi! im teeco! first of all, YOU ARE NOT STUPID!!!!! i have dyslexia and dyscalculia very badly, so school didnt work out, i felt stupid every day and was caled stupid every day, but now i realize that im not stupid, no one is! so hears some advise, my dads friend is very very very dyscalculic, but he is very high ranking in the compony, how he does meatings is when he is asked to do sumthing in a meating, he ses "ok, explane it to me as if i was a 7 year old!" they do, and then he tells em the answer or if its math realated he askes someone els to do the math. i dont know if that helps or not... good luck!
Obviously, if you made it to be a financial analyst, there ought to be something you been doing right - You are not a fraud and you shouldn't be feeling that way - You might however, want to investigate towards performance anxiety because (althought I could be wrong) this is what strikes me as your predominant difficulty. I believe there are therapies that can help you identify what's causing you to go blank, as well as teaching you ways to cope.
Good luck
It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer-- Albert Einstein
jus'
, but now i realize that im not stupid, no one is! so hears some advise, my dads friend is very very very dyscalculic, but he is very high ranking in the compony, how he does meatings is when he is asked to do sumthing in a meating, he ses "ok, explane it to me as if i was a 7 year old!" they do, and then he tells em the answer or if its math realated he askes someone els to do the math. i dont know if that helps or not... 